Comment on Jose's Paper

I think this paper of your paper is well written. You are very assertive with your claims on religion, in a good way. You don't use words that make you sound unconvinced of what you're saying so that makes for a very persuasive argument for the reader. Though I may not agree with everything that you say about religion, you take on a tone that doesn't bother me and forces me to see the point in everything that you're saying. I don't really have any sort of negative comment for you. My only concern is your usage of the second person. Using we frequently is very good for including your reader, but is not really characteristic of "formal" writing. I'm not sure that it even matters at this point to have a formal or informal paper, but that is really my only sort of concern for the paper.